Personal Power

I think that this is relevant for other women as it is for me. We all have to come to terms with a few serious issues as we grow into adult hood. The main issue being what exactly do we want out of life? I know that this is something men do too, but some woman have the habit of being incredibly giving to other people. I just finished a two year relationship. While I cherished and loved the time that was spent together when it was over the dust settled I was left feeling like I had just crawled out of the long dark of Moria. Who was I? Or better yet, who did I want to be? My life had become all about him and in that I completely lost myself.
            One of the things, that a lot of Goddess’s whom represent change and personal power tell us is that before anything new can happen the old has to come to an end. That to become ourselves we must travel through the dark of the forest to come back into the light of the day. This is something that I have always preached but I don’t think I had much self-practice. The forest can be a dark and scary place if we look at everything as a challenge. Yet instead of seeing it as a challenge we can look at it as an opportunity to find out new things about ourselves.
            Putting our ideals into alignment with this train of thought can yield tremendous results. Even at the utter and complete end of something you can come out feeling new and refreshed knowing that you have taken a step for yourself. All too often women and healers get wrapped up in taking steps for other people. We forget to love ourselves and to take care of our needs. We so often put the needs of others before our own. Is this a bad thing? No. One of the good qualities of the feminine is its devotion and loyalty to others. I believe that this is part of the great divinity of the feminine. By nature people who are feminine love to give their energy and love to other people. This is an exceedingly necessary part of the cycle of life. However, if this is also not tempered with self-reliance and concern for ones own self we can give to much of ourselves away. Sometimes that is not a problem but what happens when the people or person that we have given ourselves to is no longer in our lives? Now we’re trapped in the dark with no idea what to do.
            The practice of personal power is a relatively new idea, but at the same time an ancient concept. The huge spiritual wave of enlightenment in the early 1900’s brought with it women’s rights. Yet, in ancient times these things were commonplace. Married women in Rome had rights to everything the husband owned and could sue him for it in court if he divorced her. The Priestess’s of Ancient times were often held in high regards. In some places they even consulted in politics and held council positions to men in power. Wise women around the world were revered over the male chieftains or tribal leaders. The power of the women in these places was not feared or restricted but revered. With time and change the personal power of women was taken away until at one point they were no more than property of men.
            As I come into adulthood I am faced with the real world. A place where personal power is thought little of and where men and women alike are simply told what is expected of them.  That doesn’t make it any more important, in fact I think it should make it more. When we loose ourselves in what other people expect when those people move on (as people do) we are left not knowing what it is we should be doing. The answer to this question is “What do YOU want to be doing?”. When I came out of the forest, there was only one thing I had in my head that I wanted to do. Write. Write so much and bleed my heart and soul out onto paper. I know that not only will it help me find myself but it will give me a chance to do something I love more than anything.
            For myself personal power is about know and not being afraid of the real things in life you want. Simply knowing who you are and what you want gives you a firm sense of solidity in your life. I don’t think you will ever know exactly everything about yourself because our realities are so vast and different from one another we are always learning and changing. Though you should at least try to know enough about yourself where you can be comfortable within your own skin. Know what you want to expect from people, know how you’d like to be treated and don’t take any other treatment besides that. Know what makes you happy, and then see yourself making positive strides towards it.

Personal Power: Pages from a Witches Cabinet
Correspondences: Red, Orange, Gold, Black
Number: 1 (your OWN power)
Astrology: Aries is a deity of Power, any days or associations to Mars, During the Waxing/Full Moon
Hera, Hecate, Maeve, and other goddess of power can all be used for Personal Power invocations.
Daily affirmations are a good way to declare Personal Power: “I AM!!” is a good simple affirmation
Make lists or journal about the things that you want out of your life, write or about the things that make you happy or sad if you want to find out who you are. Actively see yourself taking steps to better your life and put yourself in a position that makes you happy.

The Beginning

I have known my whole life that I wanted to be a writer. However, the problem is that whenever I go to write something, I always reach a road block. What am I going to write about? Even at my young age, I know so much about the spiritual journey I am on. My problem is that I have no idea how to culminate this knowledge into a form that is not only legible but also enjoyable to read. I know that it is my destiny to transcribe my knowledge then to share it and teach it to whomever comes looking for it. But where do I even begin? The beginning would seem like a good start. So let me settle down, with a nice cup of tea, my glasses, and try and tell my story the best that I can.

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As far back as I can remember I have been a child with... particular spiritual gifts. I have always been able to sense spirits or energy, and on top of that I am also an empath. I was fortunate enough to be raised in a family in which these things were common to have so I was raised to nurture and care for these abilities. My family comes from all over Europe. We have Celtic blood from Ireland to Amsterdam and the practices of pagan ways has been passed down from generation to generation. Eventually coming from my grandmother to me. My grandmother is most definitely a child of the forest, her patron god is Herne. Almost everything I was taught while growing up was at her teaching. We never called ourselves "Pagan" or "Witches" this was just a way of life for us. I would come to her with questions about ghosts, my empathy skills, spiritual questions about the divine, and so much more. Eventually as I got older I was introduced to Wicca. Wicca followers the basic principles of what I was taught growing up. The love of the earth, the world of Faeries and magick, the power of energy, and the existence of the divine Mother and Father. It wasn't to long after that I started calling myself a Witch. I finally had a name for the way that I had lived my life for all these years, and it was a name that I loved.

I decided that I didn't want to be a Wiccan, it was a relatively new term for the religion of Witchcraft instead of simply the spiritual practice. I was drawn specifically to Green Witchcraft because of its work with Faeries and other Fae-kind which I had always considered myself kin to. My practice quickly began to include many aspects of Natural Magick. I would work with the elements and the natural flows of energy. I included a lot of songs with dancing to work with the Faery, set up a Faery grotto, and began to study herbal lore/remedies. At this time, I was still in High School and going into my Eleventh grade year. Eleventh Grade was the hardest grade for me in school and my empathy had gotten so active I was becoming physically ill quite often. I eventually had to drop out because I was in such bad shape that school was not helping me or teaching me anything. It was at this time that I went into the next phase of my life.

After I left school my social life completely stopped and I was absolutely cut off from most of the world. I was a hermit only on purpose. I knew that I had to focus on healing and learning to handle not only my abilities but also Witchcraft. That was when my mentor appeared and took me under her wing. She taught me about enlightenment, world knowledge, showed me what it meant to be an empath, helped awaken my potential as a healer and teacher. She had given me so much in these two years, and for sometime it was just her and I learning or experiencing life to its fullest or lowest moments. I learned and grew to amazing and exciting new levels in that time. I experienced hardships unknown and several trials. However, after much thought, meditation, and communion with my Goddess I emerged from the darkness and was granted the tittle of Priestess. This was the start of my life's work, and a path that I always knew I was destined to take.